Women's Issues Midlife And Beyond
Face your problems, don’t Facebook them. — Unknown My husband is trying to kill me. Not in an actual murder sort of way, but death by “show me how to get into my Facebook account” sort of way. This is a man who successfully ran his own business, has sat on numerous boards and loves statistics. But ask him to… Read More
“They told me ‘advertising is for dreams, not reality, and women dream to be young.’ That was their reasoning. It’s wrong of course. Not all women want to be blonde, thin, and young. But that’s the image companies want to sell. And you always have to fight it.” –Isabella Rossellini, on being sacked by Lancome I guess I’m odd…. Read More
I hate balancing the checkbook. Numbers and I have had an adversarial relationship for as long as I can remember, and I don’t see those hostile feelings changing anytime in the future. My husband, however, loves numbers. He sneaks out in the middle of the night to work on Excel sheets instead of staying between the bed sheets. What’s with… Read More
Hi Beloved Readers, It’s a super busy week for me so rather than not post a blog I went into the archives and decided to re-post one that contains: Sex. Sort of. Well not really. A nervous husband. A deep psychological study of why women like sex toys and sex shops.* When Our Naughty Bits Need Attention: The Anticipation Of… Read More
“When she smiles, the lines in her face become epic narratives that trace the stories of generations that no book can replace.” ― Curtis Tyrone Jones 99 and counting. Last week a friend’s mother celebrated 99 birthdays. When asked what kind of party she wanted she waved a hand dismissively and said she’s already thinking about the big bash for… Read More
“Not what we have but what we enjoy, constitutes our abundance.” ~ Epicurus Growing up in a rural Minnesota community meant the world was relatively small in geography, culture, and ideas. It was, however, vast in shared beliefs, a dawn-to-dusk work ethic, and life lessons. Witnessing the values of my elders helped shape my young malleable views on… Read More
“Some beautiful paths can’t be discovered without getting lost.” ― Erol Ozan My son held out the car keys. “Here you go, Mom. But before you leave I want to go over a few things with you.” He then handed me a two-page, typed, list of things I probably shouldn’t do/use/try with his ancient Dodge Neon. Things like not using the… Read More
Each time I drive back to the farm I grew up on I witness changes in the landscape. The rural area once energized by small family farms and grazing cattle has succumbed to the passage of time. Barns once proudly used and maintained now sag under broken gray spines. Brush and weeds reclaim the fields and pastures my great-grandparents worked… Read More
If you’re always trying to be normal you will never know how amazing you can be. –Maya Angelou Okay. I could stay home and do the work that needing doing, or, I could go to the North Shore with my photography club and play. A normal person would say, “Duuuuuuh! Go. Play.” I, however, agonized over the decision. For days…. Read More
“Progress occurs where truths are questioned.” ― Aniekee Tochukwu Ezekiel Aging. A word, a state of being, scrutinized more closely than George Clooney in a speedo. Almost. What does it mean to be a woman aging in a culture that is not fond of growing older? What scares us most? What body changes are the worst of the worst? What… Read More
“You are not a mistake. You are not a problem to be solved. But you won’t discover this until you are willing to stop banging your head against the wall of shaming and caging and fearing yourself. ” ― Geneen Roth, Women, Food and God: An Unexpected Path to Almost Everything 2011. I was in Tibet,… Read More
“Your child’s life will be filled with fresh experiences. It’s good if yours is as well.” —Dr. Margaret Rutherford My husband, rather new to texting, sometimes sends strange messages. There was the time he tried to tell his son–via text messaging– that we would soon be arriving at his home. The text, however, came out something akin to… Read More
“The mystery of life is not a problem to be solved but a reality to be experienced.” -Jacobus Johannes Leeuw La la la. I’m tugging at weeds, plucking thorns from my fingers (!@#$% thistles!), and marveling at how quickly the dormant plants have come back to life. Well most of them. The grape vines I put in last year are… Read More
“This is what we do, my mother’s life said. We find ourselves in the sacrifices we make.” ―Cammie McGovern, Neighborhood Watch Our cat, Giese, mewed in a weird, “this is important” stuttering sort of way. Normally a quiet cat, I looked at her with concern until I followed her gaze. Up, up, to the window above our front… Read More
“Restoring order of my personal universe suddenly seemed imperative, as I refolded my T-shirts, stuffed the toes of my shoes with tissue paper, and arranged all the bills in my secret stash box facing the same way, instead of tossed in sloppy and wild, as if by my evil twin. All week, I kept making lists and crossing things off… Read More
“The Submission Of a Meek And Timid Woman Isn’t That Much Of a Prize. But The Submission Of a Strong Woman? Now That’s a Gift. Something To Be Treasured.” ― Terri George My childhood, circa the 1960’s. It is Friday night, and anticipation hangs in the air like the scent of corn dogs at the county fair. My… Read More
But that’s the challenge – to change the system more than it changes you. -Michael Pollan Wincing, I watch as my husband starts coughing. It’s not a flemmy sort of a cough, more dry and persistent. I know, you’re probably thinking, Ew. Too much information, Gail. But I want people to know those seemingly innocent antacids are a problem…. Read More
“Each moment of our life, we either invoke or destroy our dreams.” -Stuart Wilde It’s odd what takes hold in my mind. Worse, I sometimes tell my husband my thoughts, and he starts muttering something about me being just plain weird. Meh. If that is so, I welcome the label. At least weird means I’m not beige and… Read More
“Bitches get stuff done.” –Tina Fey Hello? Does anyone else out there have an informational hole…past or present? Yeah, yeah, this is where I should tell you to keep it clean, but my mind works that way too. But no, what I mean by “informational hole” is some area, or phase, of your life where you could have… Read More
“…when women have a conversation, they’re communicating on five levels. They follow the conversation that they’re actually having, the conversation that is specifically being avoided, the tone being applied to the overt conversation, the buried conversation that is being covered only in subtext, and finally the other person’s body language.”–Jim Butcher Warm water swirled around my feet and immediately relaxed… Read More
Then a couple of years ago, I accidentally (Honest! I am way too timid to insert myself into someone’s life), instant messaged her on Facebook, and she responded! I told her about her part in my Tibet experience. She, in turn, shared with me that she had found her true love who she was about to marry. She now lives her… Read More
“I couldn’t fit any more vegetables in my basket. I guess you could say there wasn’t mushroom.” source: http://www.jokes4us.com/miscellaneousjokes/foodjokes/mushroomjokes.html “Would you like a glass of chaga water?” my friend, Dee Kotaska asked. Chaga? I had no idea what that was. Fancy imported fizzy water? The latest health drink? A new brand of flavored water? “Um, sure,” I said, but wasn’t… Read More
There’ll be two dates on your tombstone, and all your friends will read ’em but all that’s gonna matter is that little dash between ’em. ~ Kevin Welch A woman, shoulders hunched against the persistent March wind, gazed at the marble headstone before her. Head bowed, she seemed to be in meditation or reliving memories. I felt, no… Read More
Of late I miss the kind of laughter that rips through me until it hurts. It’s a glorious kind of hurt… and healing. I am currently reading a book titled Laugh Your Way To Happiness: Use the Science of Laughter for Total Well-being, by Lesley Lyle. In the book I found this story and wanted to share it with you: Navajo… Read More
Passages: AKA Where The Heck Does Time Go? “I know this much: that there is objective time, but also subjective time, the kind you wear on the inside of your wrist, next to where the pulse lies. And this personal time, which is the true time, is measured in your relationship to memory.” ― Julian Barnes My brother, my big… Read More
“Never put off till tomorrow what may be done the day after tomorrow just as well.” ― Mark Twain Phases. There was the one where I tried drinking a glass of water before each meal. The one where I had an oddly shaped device that would assist in my kegel exercises. (Yeah, yeah.. don’t go there.) The… Read More
All of the girls whose names will never be known All of the girls whose choices were not their own All of the girls denied their share of the gold All of the girls, like cattle, bought and sold All of the girls who had to submit to a man All of the girls the boys could not understand All… Read More
“Beware of missing chances: otherwise it may be altogether too late some day.” –Franz Liszt “What is wrong with you? You killed it!” I looked at the blossom in my hands and felt baffled. Why was Grandma angry at me? An hour earlier she had visited the tiny garden I was semi-nurturing, studying my efforts…. Read More
You need chaos in your soul to give birth to a dancing star. – Nietzsche Pain. Happiness. Of late I’ve been thinking about pain and happiness more and more often. It seems natural to want more of the latter unless you’re into the S & M scene. Even then I guess the goal is happiness via pain. It… Read More
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