Or seven, or ten, or fifteen. I do not mean to come off as cranky, nor do I want to cast a judgmental light on those who attempt to offer tempting quick-read tidbits. I get it. Our society rewards â€œbusy,â€ so we like to sneak in news and gossip updates while waiting for coffee, a red light, or the dentist.
Itâ€™s just that I get weary of reading headline after headline stating â€œFive Easy Ways to Write a Headline!â€ Or, â€œTen Reasons You Should Always Turn The Volume to Eleven.â€ Or, â€œFifteen Secrets Your Husband Isnâ€™t Telling You About His Nail Fungus and Internet Porn.â€
It’s all good at first because I’m hungry for a little something. Maybe it’s a salty news worthy nibble, or maybe it’s just to get a smidge buzzed on a rumor martini.
At some point, however, like one too many generic nachos, the enticement of numerical blurb-appetizers loses appeal. I want a full-on word meal complete with an â€œI actually learned something in a beautifully written articleâ€ dessert. If it takes me longer to digest, so be it. Wantingâ€¦moreâ€¦the best part of my day.