• Cart
  • Checkout
  • My Account
    • Email
    • Facebook
    • LinkedIn
    • Twitter

Aging Schmaging

Women's Issues Midlife And Beyond

  • Aging Schmaging
  • Home
  • Shop
    • Art
    • Cards
    • Photography
    • Scarves
  • Playshops
  • Blog
  • Portfolio
  • About
  • Contact
The Ripple Starts With Me
You are here: Home / Musings About Aging / Getting So Much More Than I Give: When Kindheartedness Heals

Getting So Much More Than I Give: When Kindheartedness Heals

June 22, 2016 By Gail Leave a Comment

“Remember there’s no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end.” -Scott Adams

I’ve got a problem with people being nice to me. I do. Maybe it was how I was raised. Self-sufficiency was the rule, and on those shameful days you had to ask for help you had better dang well repay generously. “Give and take” meant giving way more than taking.

It’s a good rule of thumb, I think, but it also makes it hard to accept acts of kindness. Instead of simply saying thank you and enjoying the gift, I have a need to repay in some way or other.

Recently our lawnmower got all wonky. The blades cut into the dirt, and it didn’t matter how high I set them. It looked like I was trying to plow our yard instead of mow it.

My husband is good at many things, but fixing mechanical stuff is not one of them. He walked around the lawnmower, started it up, brushed a bit of grass off the seat, and then shut it off. “We needed to get it in for repair,” he said. I nodded as I shoveled dirt back into the trenches I’d created on my crazy lawnmower joyride. “I was kind of thinking that too.”

The first problem– we no longer have a trailer. The one my husband brought into our marriage fifteen years ago was a rickety thing even in its prime. Think Beverly Hillbillies meets High School Shop Class 101. However, it was functional if you didn’t drive too far or if you didn’t load it with anything heavier than one of my husband’s famous fruitcakes.

Years passed, and the thing became downright feeble. If wood can acquire osteoporosis, it had it. The tires were flat half the time, and questionable the other half. One of the rear lights hung at an odd angle and gave it a saucy, slightly deranged, look. It was like a terminal eye twitch. Finally, my husband gave up. He drove it to the local landfill and paid for its funeral. “We don’t need a trailer,” he said, and we both tried to believe it.

The second problem—we need a trailer. The repair shop we like no longer is willing to come and get our lawnmower. “We only did that as a one time favor,” they said. Saying please, please, please, got us nowhere.

Meanwhile, our lawn was growing into a lush and fertile meadow. Apparently plowing it was a stimulant. I began eyeing a distant neighbor’s goats as plan B. But, I’d need a trailer to get them. Arrgh!

Reluctantly, my husband called Dennis. Dennis is an uber-kind fellow who provides us with fresh eggs, plows us out when winter gets nasty, and never, ever, expects much in return. His wife Sharon is cut from the same cloth. “Could you possibly help us get our lawnmower in for repair?” my husband said.

The Ripple Starts With Me

Kindness, the ripple starts with me

“Of course!” said Dennis. “I’ll be there in the morning.” And he was.

When we got the call that our lawnmower was repaired and ready Dennis volunteered to get it. My husband and I looked at each other. How do you repay so much kindness?

Today the phone rang. “How’s the lawnmower running?” said Dennis.

“I was just about to mow the grass,” I said. “I guess I’ll find out!”

“If you have any problems let me know, okay?”

“Yes, and thank you for checking.”

I went out to the garage, plopped onto the lawnmower seat, and turned the key. The engine grumbled to life, and I headed into the sunshine. The wild meadow slowly returned to a somewhat tame yard.

A short while later Dennis drove by. I waved and gave the universal “thumbs up” sign. Dennis waved back. Did he need to run an errand, I thought, or was he gently checking to make sure I didn’t need help?

Kindness. It’s still hard for me to accept because I feel that need to repay, repay, repay. But seeing the dust curl behind Dennis’s truck as he drove down the road softened me, healed me, in some finding-the-light sort of way.

Sometimes saying thank you with a grateful heart is enough.

I could repay Dennis by being equally kind to others, if that is even possible. The ripple starts with me.

«
»

Filed Under: Musings About Aging Tagged With: Healing, Kindness, Midlife Musings

Avatar photo

A Message From Gail

Through my blog and website, I hope to share beauty, laughter, inspiration, aging & midlife lessons and advice on dealing with menopause. I will also devote time to integrative health and healing tips and news. I want feedback and questions because, while we may be sharing the journey, every woman has her own experience and her own story.

Get Our FREE 
Coloring Book!

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Download
Our FREE
Coloring Book!

Get Updates – Signup

Once a month one lucky winner from the sign up pool will receive a scarf courtesy of Aging Schmaging. Good luck!

Categories

  • Giveaways
  • Menopause
  • Midlife Sex
  • Musings About Aging
  • Recipes
  • Remembering
  • Sharing
  • The Best Part Of My Day

Recent Posts

  • Past, Present, and Future: What I am Learning as My Husband Recovers from A Stroke By Gail Gates
  • In One Stroke, My World Changed
  • Christmas Fingerprints On The Surface Of My Heart
  • Tears Water A Memorial Garden
  • Crap Wildlife Photography: How I received 1800 “Likes” From A Fugly Photo

Navigate My Site

  • Almost Done!
  • Free Coloring Book
  • Menopause And Women In Midlife Blog
  • Playshops
  • Privacy Policy
  • Return Policy
  • Shop
  • Silk Scarves Playshops Registration
  • Sitemap
  • Success!
  • Testimonials
  • About
  • Contact

Recent Posts

  • Past, Present, and Future: What I am Learning as My Husband Recovers from A Stroke By Gail Gates
  • In One Stroke, My World Changed
  • Christmas Fingerprints On The Surface Of My Heart
  • Tears Water A Memorial Garden
  • Crap Wildlife Photography: How I received 1800 “Likes” From A Fugly Photo

Connect With Me

  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter

Featured From the Shop

  • habitoi silk scarf Habatoi Hand Painted Silk Scarf 101 $35.00
  • grand marais summer solstice Grand Marais Solstice $10.00 – $45.00

Copyright © 2023 · Gail Theme On Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in

Cleantalk Pixel