“The night is the hardest time to be alive and 4 am knows all my secrets.” ― Poppy Z. Brite When women gather, one of the most frequent comments I hear is, “I’m so freak’n tired!” Oh, do I feel you, sister! Quality sleep, for many of us too-busy women, is elusive. I wrote this blog a little while back,… Read More
Menopausal Bone Loss: What’s A-peeling about Onions?
“If you’ve never eaten while crying you don’t know what life tastes like.” ― Johann Wolfgang von Goethe Onions? You may be thinking I’d better write about something more interesting than the lowly onion to keep your attention. You got me. At this point I can only hold my hands up, take a step back, and agree that onions are not… Read More
Poking My Head In The Sex Blog Refrigerator For Leftovers…
Hi Beloved Readers, It’s a super busy week for me so rather than not post a blog I went into the archives and decided to re-post one that contains: Sex. Sort of. Well not really. A nervous husband. A deep psychological study of why women like sex toys and sex shops.* When Our Naughty Bits Need Attention: The Anticipation Of… Read More
The Cake Looks Like It Is On Fire: What does a longer life span mean in terms of menopause?
“When she smiles, the lines in her face become epic narratives that trace the stories of generations that no book can replace.” ― Curtis Tyrone Jones 99 and counting. Last week a friend’s mother celebrated 99 birthdays. When asked what kind of party she wanted she waved a hand dismissively and said she’s already thinking about the big bash for… Read More
I Am So !@#$ Tired: Midlife, Women, and Sleeplessness
Insomnia is a gross feeder. It will nourish itself on any kind of thinking,Â including thinking about not thinking. ~Clifton Fadiman Kathy looked at me with a raised eyebrow. â€œYou were up at 2 a.m.? Me too!â€ I nodded with empathy.Â â€œDonâ€™t you hate it?Â Mostly I canâ€™t shut off my brain.Â Â I worry that Iâ€™m too far behind on my… Read More
Moon Pause, Part 9: Choose To Be The Masterpiece Of Your Life
Conclusions Over the past eight weeks, Iâ€™ve delved into a variety of issues that women (and men) face in the second half of life. I feel as though I stood next to an iceberg of information and only scratched the surface enough to make a margarita. The topic of aging women is diverse, challenging, and exciting. Will my definition of… Read More
Moon Pause, Part 8: Grief And The Aging Woman
â€œA young man saw an elderly couple sitting down to lunch at McDonald’s. He noticed that they had ordered one meal, and an extra drink cup. As he watched, the gentleman carefully divided the hamburger in half, then counted out the fries, one for him, one for her, until each had half of them. Then he poured half of the… Read More
Moon Pause, Part 5: Sex And The Aging Woman
â€œAn older woman looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women or drag queens. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, an older woman is far sexier than her younger counterpart. Her libido’s stronger, her fear of pregnancy gone. Her experience of lovemaking is honed and reciprocal and she’s lived long enough to know… Read More
Moon Pause (Menopause), Part 4:
“You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the thingsÂ that make you want to live to be a hundred.” â€“Woody Allen Common Symptoms That Enhance Our Swearing Vocabulary Headaches (Not tonight, Dear) According to a symposium held to discuss the correlation between migraine headaches and menopause, women have up to five times as many migraine… Read More
Moon-Pause, Part 3: Fat Chance of Staying Thin!
The American standard of beauty demands women appear slender. Constant media onslaughts display happy, sexy, glamorous women who are a size 0-2, and ridicule anyone breaking free of the cultural â€œrulesâ€. Oh sure, once in a rare while a female celebrity will have the nerve to show her face in public, smiling, proud of her Aphrodite curves. Â No, no, no!… Read More
Moonpause Part 2: Generational Differences In Menopause Experiences
If we look at our current culture, it is easy to point mental fingers at differences between prior generations and today. Unlike our mothers and grandmothers, we started yo-yo dieting as teenagers, and probably never stopped. We are the first long-term users of birth control pills. Our foods are laden with artificial ingredients and hormones, refined to death, and packaged… Read More
Menopause Or Moonpause
â€œOlder women are forthright and honest. They’ll tell you right off you are a jerk if you are acting like one.â€ â€“Andy Rooney Menopause. A word, a state of being, scrutinized more closely than George Clooney in a speedo. What does it mean? How long does it last? How can we deal with the symptoms? Why are my symptoms different… Read More
Menopause and Anxiety: Four And A Half Tips To Try
Five Seemed Too Stressful! â€œIf you trade your authenticity for safety, you may experience the following:Â anxiety, depression, eating disorders, addiction, rage,Â blame, resentment, and inexplicable grief.â€ -Brene Brown Whyyyyyyyy???? You feel anxious, and the more you try to move past it the more you seem to feed the fear. Are you going crazy, or is anxiety just one more symptom of… Read More
Progesterone: The Jan Brady of Hormones?
If Marcia Brady were estrogen, and sister Jan progesterone, the infamous line would still applyâ€¦â€Estrogen, Estrogen, Estrogen!â€ Estrogen embodies femaleness, it dominates, it ebbs, and it gets more than its fair share of press. Say the word â€œestrogenâ€ in mixed company and the following will likely occur– women nod and men get twitchy. Progesterone, on the other hand, is somewhat… Read More
Estrogen Dominance: So Much More Than A Cool Name For A Rock Band.
Itâ€™s confusing, isnâ€™t it?Â The way our bodies change and seem to go rogue on us? As we age a baffling number of transformations occur and we scramble to figure out if they are normal, abnormal, or some sort of ancient curse unleashed when we touched that museum piece we werenâ€™t supposed to touch.Â Where did that hair come from?Â Why is… Read More
Cranky From Lack of Quality Menopausal Sleep?
Five Ways You Can Improve Your Sleep at Midlife Itâ€™s 1 a.m. and your digital alarm clock is taunting you. Â Those little blue numerical lights glow brightly in your wide-open eyeballs. Â You close your eyes with stern force, hug your pillow for dear life, and will yourself to let go. Â Sleep! Â You NEED sleep. Â Ten minutes later you find yourself… Read More
Menopause: A Portal not a Punishment, Cont.
Last week my story entry ended with my confusion about entering a new love relationship in midlife. Even though I adored my soon-to-be husband, letting go of my hard won independence was daunting. During my single-motherhood years I tested my strength and voice as a woman, and now I would once again be sharing decisions. Would it feel like I… Read More
From Puberty to The Second Puberty… Menopause…
Let’s see, where was I? Â Oh yeah. Â The reason Iâ€™m mentioning my history is because I had questions not only in my youth, but as I took a running jump towards menopause. The same wall of silence I ran into as a teenager was hitting me in early midlife. I always had irregular periods, but when I turned thirty-eight they… Read More
Menopause and the Women In My Life
So now that you know what Iâ€™d like to talk about, maybe it would be helpful to share a little of who I am and why I find menopause and the subject of female aging so inspiring. I grew up in a pretty classic Minnesota family. My dad was 100% Norwegian, charming, and incredibly hard working. He married a half… Read More
Menopause and Me
Hello beautiful women! Iâ€™m going to share with you, over a period of weeks, a talk I gave at Jodi Baglienâ€™s Wellness Center. It is my hope youâ€™ll connect with some, or all, of the content. If you do, please let me know. If you donâ€™t, please let me know. This website exists to help women, and I need your… Read More
Menopause: A Portal not a Punishment
Ah, menopause. With 38 million baby-boomer women now in midlife or beyond, the subject of menopause is no longer one kept to hushed conversations over a second pitcher of margaritas and a platter of nachos. Unlike our mothers or grandmothers, Boomer women and those following in our paths want to talk about what weâ€™re experiencing. Maybe we seek opportunities to… Read More
Menopause, Transitions, And Identity
Melissa McCarthy had me wincing and laughing at my own likeness through her character, Molly, on the sitcom Mike and Molly. I seldom watch the show, but it is rerun season and my cat, Giese, needed some lap time. Molly has apparently left her teaching job to be a writer. She secured her husbandâ€™s support and threw herself into the… Read More
Menopause and Me, Part 5
According to Christiane Northrup, estrogen levels actually increase, or remain stable during peri-menopause. Until then, the main estrogen, estuarial, stays the same but the body also produces more estrone, which is produced in fat cells and the ovaries. (There are three types of estrogen in the body: estradial, estrone, and estriol. (Northrup, 2003)). Testosterone levels are variable during this time,… Read More
Menopause and Me, Part 3
I decided to find a new doctor to work with. Somehow I discovered/stumbled upon Melissa Frisvold, a nurse- practitioner and midwife in Stillwater, MN. What a difference! Melissa made me feel listened to and cared about. After her exam, she suggested I read Christiane Northrupâ€™s book The Wisdom of Menopause, Dr. John Leeâ€™s book, What Your Doctor May Not Tell… Read More