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You are here: Home / Musings About Aging / Age-cuses

Age-cuses

August 29, 2014 By Gail 2 Comments

“Gail, go out and fetch the mail. I’m getting to old to do all that running around.”

As a kid I used to feel irritated with that line of thinking. It seemed to me that the adults in my life had plenty of energy to do the things they wanted to do, but ran out when it was something that didn’t suit them. Having my elders claim a sudden debilitating case of old age didn’t make me feel youthful and spry, it made me feel like a lackey. I promised myself that I would never use that line on someone younger than me as I grew older, and as of today I don’t believe I have.

I’m not bringing this up to start an early petition for sainthood on my part, although if you insisted I’d be loath to stop the momentum. ☺ No, I’m mentioning it because I have seen how the “too old” ideology spreads like the flu throughout a person’s attitude and damages a healthy self-esteem.

How often have you heard someone say, “I’ve always wanted to try that, but it’s too late now.” Huh? Too late? Why? Has some mythical expiration date turned a long shelved goal sour? Says who? And if this “something” really mattered throughout your life, why not give it a shot now?

How often have you heard someone say, “I’d love to wear that but it’s just not age-appropriate.” Again, says who exactly? Here’s an example…what is the worst thing that could happen if, at age seventy-five, you decide to wear a bright red pencil skirt? Social stoning? I don’t think so. A wolf whistle? Envious stares from your less saucy friends? Those last two, which I believe are more likely, seem pretty non-scary to me. Hey, maybe try some red lipstick too!

How often have you heard someone say, “If I were only twenty years younger I’d ________.” Okay, there are some things where age is a consideration at the moment, like conception and childbearing, if you are a woman. But even so, many women have found mothering later in life (through a surrogate, IVF, adoption, foster care, or mentoring) offers advantages over more youthful times. Examples of famous moms giving birth in mid-life include: Holly Hunter who gave birth to twin boys at 47. Iman, the supermodel wife of David Bowie, had a daughter, Alexandria, at 45. Susan Sarandon had her second son, Miles Guthrie, at 45. Tell me again why the “If I were only twenty years younger…” matters.

As I continue to speak with middle-aged women I’ve come to hear one thing loud and clear, and it is this… “Do it now.” Stop making excuses, stop using age as a weapon or a defense, and stop filling your thoughts with reasons why you can’t. We are given one life of indeterminate length. Live it.

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Filed Under: Musings About Aging

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A Message From Gail

Through my blog and website, I hope to share beauty, laughter, inspiration, aging & midlife lessons and advice on dealing with menopause. I will also devote time to integrative health and healing tips and news. I want feedback and questions because, while we may be sharing the journey, every woman has her own experience and her own story.

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Comments

  1. Claudia Kittock says

    August 31, 2014 at 2:47 pm

    Thank you, thank you, thank you for writing this!! We completely and totally agree on this entire topic, and, I think are great examples of this. How old were YOU when you completed your master’s degree? I STARTED running at 53, ran my first 5K at 56, and climbed an active volcano AND zip lined at 6700 feet at age 62. WHEN are we too old?

    Brilliantly written and reasoned, but I’ve come to expect no less from you!!

    Reply
    • Avatar photoGail says

      September 2, 2014 at 1:17 am

      Hi Claudia!

      This sounds dangerously close to a love letter, but you inspire me daily. And although your birth certificate “dates” you, there is nothing, NOTHING, in your zest for life that does. Shine on, my dear. Your light matters.

      Reply

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